By Davalynn Spencer @davalynnspencer
A couple of weeks ago, a stomach bug, the flu, or whatever the latest identifier is stopped by for a visit. During its stay, more than my body was affected.
The weakness – or its agent of delivery – made impressions on my groggy mind and dreams.
Those days were dark, and too many times my thoughts circled back to a 15-month-old offense I thought I’d let go of.
Recurring impressions stirred through me of how unjustified the offense was. How wrong and unfair the lie was that had besmirched someone close to me.
I knew both sides of the story and had dealt with “letting go,” trusting Him whose vengeance is greater than mine to handle the situation.
I just hadn’t seen that happen yet.
The need for justification became as oppressive as my stomach ailment. In the sickness, I formulated a perfect case as though I were a prosecuting attorney. The original lie was not only perpetrated by a family member, but it was believed by others even closer who should have known better.
With such a perfect argument, was God talking to me, telling me to approach the person who had wounded me the deepest and lay out the facts? Was He directing me to take action steps, to go after the closest offending party and point out their failure to ferret out the truth?
I justified my argument and myself. After all, someone had been unfairly lied about, and it was my duty to defend them. Right?
But how was I to know who was filling me with this impulse and giving me such perfect points to make? Was the message from God?
Did I have such clarity over the misdeed because God sent the impression? Was this the voice of the Lord giving me direction?
What was God’s will?
How could I tell?
How would I know?
The answer came clearly and simply.
Go to His Word. God’s personal directive will never contradict His written Word.
Scriptures flooded my groggy brain.
~forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us (Luke 11:4)
~If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also (Matthew 5:38-40)
~But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins (Matthew 6:15)
Those recorded words of Jesus carried healing. I could rest on them, step back and take them to heart, or I could press on in what I believed to be righteous indignation.
The choice was mine.
I desperately wanted to attack.
I didn’t want to submit to the Lord’s clear command. But when I did, a weight lifted and my spirit lightened.
It was very simple, actually. Not easy, but simple.
And as I recovered, my thinking cleared.
I do not credit the physical illness as either the cause or effect of my spiritual struggle during those dark days. But it plowed up ground for a second sowing of whatever thoughts I allowed.
Bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness have the ability to poison us if we let them. They can shackle us and tie us up in knots.
I choose freedom. I choose forgiveness.
And that is the kicker. Forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling.
The Lord gives righteousness and justice
to all who are treated unfairly.
Psalm 103:6
~
“People have been very kind to me since I returned, more so than I imagined possible.” Betsy set down her coffee cup and tucked her hands in her lap. “Though I believe my brother is still quietly angry with my independent streak, as he would call it. In that way, I am much like our father.” She frowned at mention of her pa.
“Forgiveness is healing medicine, ” Garrett said. “For both sides.”
She cut a glance across the table, taking in his words. “A couple of people have shown their disapproval, but it seems most have forgiven me,” she said. “I didn’t expect that.”
He could change the subject. Talk about the arsonist. Maggie. The weather, but he didn’t. “Someone hasn’t.”
The idea sent her on a frantic mental search, as clear on her face as if she were lining people up, hunting for that one person until realization hit. “My parents can’t forgive me. They’re gone.”
He shook his head, testing the waters.
“Who?”
“You ran off the last time I mentioned it.”
“I did not.” She drew up. “When?”
“Echo Valley.”
“I did not run off.”
“Well, what do you call getting up and riding away?”
“I call it work. We had things to do.” Another pointed look. “What are you suggesting?”
“I’m suggesting that you haven’t forgiven yourself because you don’t believe you deserve it.” He let the words settle, then lowered his voice. “None of us deserve it, Betsy. It’s a gift.” ~An Unexpected Redemption
Inspirational Western Romance – where the hero is heroic.
#lovingthecowboy
(c) 2025 Davalynn Spencer, all rights reserved.
#WesternRomance #ChristianFiction #FreeBook #HistoricalRomance #ContemporaryCowboyRomance
Good afternoon, and you are so very right, Forgiveness is a choice not a feeling. We just have to give it to God when we feel overwhelmed., we cannot change people. Thank you for sharing this , I truly agree with you and I needed to be reminded of this again. Have a Great week. God Bless you and your family.
It is so important to check what we “is from the Lord” with the written Word. It is so easy sometimes to credit God with our own feelings and if we are not careful, we will end up in severe error. Thank you for your insights and willingness to be open and transparent. I so enjoy these blogs and your books are so inspiring and full of faith.