By Davalynn Spencer @davalynnspencer
George and I went out for dinner last week, and I actually chose a restaurant that did not serve tacos. That’s a big deal for me—I love tacos. But the egg foo young they served was excellent.
As we awaited our meal, sipping Jasmine tea and lemonade, another couple came in and took a booth across the room from us. They did not say a word to each other but immediately pulled out their cell phones and left.
No, they didn’t get up and go anywhere, they stayed right there in their booth seats facing each other, but they both were gone.
George and I continued to watch them, discreetly of course, expecting them to at least acknowledge one another. They didn’t.
Were they fasting conversation?
Were they both suffering from laryngitis?
They looked about the same age, but they never looked at each other. Coworkers would have spoken. Siblings would have snarked or laughed.
I guessed they were married.
Had to be.
God help us.
By the time we finished our meal and left, they were eating, but in silence. As if a wall had been erected right down the middle of their table.
I believe their cell phones raised an invisible barrier between them.
Is it an addiction or an excuse? Are we so umbilically connected to our smart phones that we can’t keep them in our pocket or purse and have a conversation with a dinner mate?
This was not the first time I’ve seen such behavior. I fly yearly, and airports are full of people who appear to not know that other people are there too. Face-to-phone. Earbuds in, life out.
I know, some of those people could be reading, studying, conversing with someone somewhere.
But in the case of the couple at the Chinese restaurant, why did they bother going out to eat together?
To my married readers, please—put your phone down and look at your spouse. Find one thing you love or admire about them and let them know. (Do not send them a text!)
Talk to them. Ask them to share the best thing that happened to them that day. Or the worst. Listen.
If you go out with or spend time with a child or grandchild, keep your phone out of sight. Demonstrate that they are more important to you than the next meme, notification, text, email, post, pod, or whatever.
Give them the common courtesy of your undivided attention.
And ask yourself: If the electronic world goes suddenly dark, will I know how to talk to people?
~
And let us consider how to
stir up one another to
love and good works,
not neglecting to meet together,
as is the habit of some,
but encouraging one another,
and all the more as you
see the Day drawing near.
Hebrews 10:24-25
Iron sharpens iron, and
one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17
Therefore encourage one another
and build each other up,
just as in fact you are doing.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Gracious words
are a honeycomb,
sweet to the soul and
healing to the bones.
Proverbs 16:24
Let your conversation
be always full of grace,
seasoned with salt,
so that you may know
how to answer everyone.
Colossians 4:6
Jed occupied his rocker near the fireplace, and his eyes darkened when he saw her. Was he going to terminate her before the probationary period was over?
He indicated the empty chair. “I imagine you’re tired, based on the way the house smells.”
Hope smiled at his offhand compliment. “It was a full day, but worth it.”
He drank his coffee with short, quick gulps as she sugared her cup. “You handled the lion situation with Bert real good.”
An imposter receiving two compliments in less than two minutes? Her guilt grew proportionately, but she refused to appear ungrateful. “Thank you.”
A final swallow of the strong brew, and he set his cup aside and stretched his legs to the hearth.
Silence hung over them until Hope peeked sideways to see if he had fallen asleep.
He had not.
“You’ve got your hands full with those three mavericks, but you’ve lasted longer than anyone else.” His voice was uncharacteristically gentle.
Truly surprised, she glanced his way again. He was staring into the fire, wearing weariness like a cloak.
“I enjoy them. Each of them is so different than the others, but we seem to get on well.”
He snorted, then begged her pardon. “Blasted habit.” He straightened and pulled his stockinged feet back.
“May I ask you something?” She expected resistance, but she needed to know.
He squinted her way. “Ask what you want, but I may not answer.”
Straight forward. It could be worse.
“What happened to the children’s parents?”
He looked back to the hearth for a long moment. Only the fire’s voice broke the silence with its snaps and whooshes as logs gave way to flame.
So much for restful conversation.
She waited out of respect, but she would press the answer either now or later, and she preferred getting it over with. ~A Thorn in Winter’s Grasp
Inspirational Western Romance – where the hero is heroic.
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(c) 2026 Davalynn Spencer, all rights reserved.
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Amen to all that you wrote!!
It’s a real problem these days! God made us to need community with each other!
There is a void that NO smart phone can ever fill!
Only God fills our loneliness. We can be in a crowd of people these days and feel invisible!
Fill your lives with God-loving friends! It’s such a blessing to have them in your life!!
Amen, Karen!
That’s interesting.
We rarely go out, but when we do it’s as a family—usually in celebration of a birthday or anniversary.
Most of those times, my grown kids do pull out their phones, but it’s to look up something we’re talking about or share a photo or video with everyone at the table. Both our kids have autism and one processes written words better than spoken words, but at the table we all talk to each other.